Sunday, June 04, 2006
My Sister-In-Laws
My brother has been married twice. He married his first wife Vivian when he was twenty and she was only sixteen. Shortly after they were married, their one and only son was born.
Vivian was one of twelve children. Her oldest sister had met and married my uncle while he was attending a college not far from where they lived in Alabama. After college, my uncle moved his new wife to Detroit to be closer to his family.
After my brother graduated from high school he decided to attend college in that same small town. He was invited to stay with Vivian’s family. Being in the same house with Vivian afforded them the opportunity to spend a lot of time together.
Despite the objections of family members, they got married and moved back to Detroit. Vivian was the same age as my sister Nita and they were actually in the same graduating class. After the birth of my nephew my brother and his wife started experiencing marital problems and soon divorced.
Vivian had married my brother to get away from the confines of her family. She wanted to get out and experience the world. So when she got a chance to see what life had to offer, she found out that marriage to my brother was not really what she had wanted.
He met and married his second wife Janet soon after. She too had been previously married and became a mother at a very young age. Janet wasn’t really spiritually based when she and my brother got married. She did attend church. A very popular and large non-denominational church here in Detroit.
As Janet’s attendance at church increased, so did her faith. She began to study the word of God more and then came a day when she began to question the theology of the church she was currently attending. There were things that were being taught there that she discovered weren’t necessarily biblically based. This troubled Janet greatly and she decided to look for a new church home.
She found a church whose teachings were more in line with biblical scripture and decided to settle there. She ultimately convinced my brother and her daughter to switch to the new church as well. She would also attempt to convince myself and other members of the family to join even though we were already members of other churches. She became just a little obsessed with her new thirst for the word of God as it was being taught in her new church home.
Now I must stop and add my own personal footnote here. As I have mentioned I am a Baptist by choice. I follow the Baptist doctrine. That’s my personal choice. I also know that all religious titles are man made. Given that, it is not my place to judge anyone’s theology. I cannot believe that when we get to heaven there will be a separate place for Baptist, Catholics, Protestants, Episcopalians, and so forth.
No matter what your religious beliefs are or what you may be told, keep in mind to never just accept what anyone tells your or teaches you on religious issues. Be it your own pastor, visiting Bishop, or even the Pope himself, read it for yourself.
Janet changed when she began attending this new church. Her relationships also changed. Now I know that it says once we accept Christ as our personal savior that we should change and that many of the things that we used to do would also change. But it also says that we should intercede on behalf of our own families and friends.
Janet took the position that if you didn’t believe what she believed and you did things that were outside of what she was being taught, then she didn’t want to have anything to do with you. This attitude was extended towards everyone she knew including her own husband. This newfound religion contributed to the breakdown of an already tumultuous relationship.
She was not actually practicing what she was preaching. Janet would go out every Saturday to do what is called street witnessing to try to win souls for Christ. But she neglected her responsibilities to her home and family.
Proverbs 14:1
The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.
One of the biggest mistakes that we as Christians make is that we begin to believe that once we are saved, sanctified and filled with the Holy Spirit that we don’t sin anymore. We begin to believe that those who continue to sin are beneath them and we only have contempt for them.
Not!
Romans 3:23
for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,
Saints, don’t fool your selves. The only thing that separates you from those whom you feel are beneath you, is the grace of God. And if you feel that the unsaved are beneath you, then not even God’s grace and mercy can save you.
It is not our place to judge what others do and how they choose to live their lives. Our job as Christians is only to witness about the goodness of God and spread the good news of the Gospel. We become as the Scribes and Pharisees when we put ourselves above our fellow man (or sisters as the case may be).
Matthew 7:1
"Do not judge, or you too will be judged.
Vivian was one of twelve children. Her oldest sister had met and married my uncle while he was attending a college not far from where they lived in Alabama. After college, my uncle moved his new wife to Detroit to be closer to his family.
After my brother graduated from high school he decided to attend college in that same small town. He was invited to stay with Vivian’s family. Being in the same house with Vivian afforded them the opportunity to spend a lot of time together.
Despite the objections of family members, they got married and moved back to Detroit. Vivian was the same age as my sister Nita and they were actually in the same graduating class. After the birth of my nephew my brother and his wife started experiencing marital problems and soon divorced.
Vivian had married my brother to get away from the confines of her family. She wanted to get out and experience the world. So when she got a chance to see what life had to offer, she found out that marriage to my brother was not really what she had wanted.
He met and married his second wife Janet soon after. She too had been previously married and became a mother at a very young age. Janet wasn’t really spiritually based when she and my brother got married. She did attend church. A very popular and large non-denominational church here in Detroit.
As Janet’s attendance at church increased, so did her faith. She began to study the word of God more and then came a day when she began to question the theology of the church she was currently attending. There were things that were being taught there that she discovered weren’t necessarily biblically based. This troubled Janet greatly and she decided to look for a new church home.
She found a church whose teachings were more in line with biblical scripture and decided to settle there. She ultimately convinced my brother and her daughter to switch to the new church as well. She would also attempt to convince myself and other members of the family to join even though we were already members of other churches. She became just a little obsessed with her new thirst for the word of God as it was being taught in her new church home.
Now I must stop and add my own personal footnote here. As I have mentioned I am a Baptist by choice. I follow the Baptist doctrine. That’s my personal choice. I also know that all religious titles are man made. Given that, it is not my place to judge anyone’s theology. I cannot believe that when we get to heaven there will be a separate place for Baptist, Catholics, Protestants, Episcopalians, and so forth.
No matter what your religious beliefs are or what you may be told, keep in mind to never just accept what anyone tells your or teaches you on religious issues. Be it your own pastor, visiting Bishop, or even the Pope himself, read it for yourself.
Janet changed when she began attending this new church. Her relationships also changed. Now I know that it says once we accept Christ as our personal savior that we should change and that many of the things that we used to do would also change. But it also says that we should intercede on behalf of our own families and friends.
Janet took the position that if you didn’t believe what she believed and you did things that were outside of what she was being taught, then she didn’t want to have anything to do with you. This attitude was extended towards everyone she knew including her own husband. This newfound religion contributed to the breakdown of an already tumultuous relationship.
She was not actually practicing what she was preaching. Janet would go out every Saturday to do what is called street witnessing to try to win souls for Christ. But she neglected her responsibilities to her home and family.
Proverbs 14:1
The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.
One of the biggest mistakes that we as Christians make is that we begin to believe that once we are saved, sanctified and filled with the Holy Spirit that we don’t sin anymore. We begin to believe that those who continue to sin are beneath them and we only have contempt for them.
Not!
Romans 3:23
for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,
Saints, don’t fool your selves. The only thing that separates you from those whom you feel are beneath you, is the grace of God. And if you feel that the unsaved are beneath you, then not even God’s grace and mercy can save you.
It is not our place to judge what others do and how they choose to live their lives. Our job as Christians is only to witness about the goodness of God and spread the good news of the Gospel. We become as the Scribes and Pharisees when we put ourselves above our fellow man (or sisters as the case may be).
Matthew 7:1
"Do not judge, or you too will be judged.
