Sunday, December 04, 2005
Maggie and Fred
Maggie and Fred had dated all through high school. In their senior year Fred got a scholarship to a college out of state. Maggie who had always been a mediocre student didn’t have any plans for after high school. Just before their graduation, Maggie announced she was pregnant.
Maggie and Fred have now been married for over twenty years. They have two sons, who are now both grown. Fred never did go to college. He has spent the last twenty years working in an auto factory. During the course of their twenty-year marriage, Fred has always had a girlfriend on the side. He has never tried to hide that fact from his wife. Last year after their youngest son graduated from high school, Fred left Maggie. He said he had fulfilled his obligation. Now it was time for him to get his life back. Maggie, who had never worked during the entire twenty years, is now left on her own, with no children, no husband, and no job or job skills. She is over forty years old. Ladies, you can’t make him love you!
What happened with Mark and I? Well about a year and a half into the relationship, I became pregnant. Now remember, Mark is already married and has a little girl. He and his wife are still together and I am just his woman on the side. I was only nineteen years olds and still working in a fast-food restaurant.
During the seventies, free love and promiscuity were the rule and not the exception. Safe sex was an unheard concept and abortions were a convenient solution to a complex problem. I had my first abortion. Something that I would have to deal with; both spiritually and emotionally later in life.
Since I knew that I did not want to become pregnant again, I had began using birth controls pills and I was a cigarette smoker. This would cause my next brush with death. I started having difficulty breathing and dizzy spells. I knew something was wrong, but didn’t know what. One day after having one of these episodes, I found myself in the hospital emergency room. They examined me and said they couldn’t find anything physically wrong with me and sent me home. I had already made an appointment with my personal physician for the next day.
When I got up the next morning, again I found that I couldn’t breathe. I went to my scheduled doctors appointment. The doctor took ex-rays and announced I was to be admitted to the hospital immediately. I had a blood clot in my lung. My dizziness and inability to breathe was being caused by the blood clot moving through my body. I had to be admitted to the hospital in order to dissolve it or I could die from a stroke. I was in the hospital for three weeks. I had lost 30 pounds and a lot of my hair to boot.
After leaving the hospital, I was on blood thinners and anti-clotting drugs for a very long time. I was also no longer allowed to take the pill. I was like a walking skeleton. I wouldn’t see Mark again for another ten or twelve years.
Now many would say that God was punishing me for my sins. That’s not how I look at it. I believe God knew I was in a predicament I was not going to get out of anytime soon. Because of my own foolishness, I found myself in a situation that was far beyond my understanding and control. Also keeping in mind that God did allow me to go through what I did and to suffer what I had to, to bring me out.
You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea. Micah 7:19
Maggie and Fred have now been married for over twenty years. They have two sons, who are now both grown. Fred never did go to college. He has spent the last twenty years working in an auto factory. During the course of their twenty-year marriage, Fred has always had a girlfriend on the side. He has never tried to hide that fact from his wife. Last year after their youngest son graduated from high school, Fred left Maggie. He said he had fulfilled his obligation. Now it was time for him to get his life back. Maggie, who had never worked during the entire twenty years, is now left on her own, with no children, no husband, and no job or job skills. She is over forty years old. Ladies, you can’t make him love you!
What happened with Mark and I? Well about a year and a half into the relationship, I became pregnant. Now remember, Mark is already married and has a little girl. He and his wife are still together and I am just his woman on the side. I was only nineteen years olds and still working in a fast-food restaurant.
During the seventies, free love and promiscuity were the rule and not the exception. Safe sex was an unheard concept and abortions were a convenient solution to a complex problem. I had my first abortion. Something that I would have to deal with; both spiritually and emotionally later in life.
Since I knew that I did not want to become pregnant again, I had began using birth controls pills and I was a cigarette smoker. This would cause my next brush with death. I started having difficulty breathing and dizzy spells. I knew something was wrong, but didn’t know what. One day after having one of these episodes, I found myself in the hospital emergency room. They examined me and said they couldn’t find anything physically wrong with me and sent me home. I had already made an appointment with my personal physician for the next day.
When I got up the next morning, again I found that I couldn’t breathe. I went to my scheduled doctors appointment. The doctor took ex-rays and announced I was to be admitted to the hospital immediately. I had a blood clot in my lung. My dizziness and inability to breathe was being caused by the blood clot moving through my body. I had to be admitted to the hospital in order to dissolve it or I could die from a stroke. I was in the hospital for three weeks. I had lost 30 pounds and a lot of my hair to boot.
After leaving the hospital, I was on blood thinners and anti-clotting drugs for a very long time. I was also no longer allowed to take the pill. I was like a walking skeleton. I wouldn’t see Mark again for another ten or twelve years.
Now many would say that God was punishing me for my sins. That’s not how I look at it. I believe God knew I was in a predicament I was not going to get out of anytime soon. Because of my own foolishness, I found myself in a situation that was far beyond my understanding and control. Also keeping in mind that God did allow me to go through what I did and to suffer what I had to, to bring me out.
You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea. Micah 7:19
